 |
A D V I C E A N D I N F O R M A T I O N : P A R E N T I N G A D V I C E
Keep the dialogue open and ongoing when it comes to questions about drugs
If you have a teenager at home, you may have already gotten The Question, and I’m not talking about the birds and the bees.
These days, it seems there’s another query that can fill parents with dread: “Did you smoke pot when you were my age?”
Even if the answer is “yes,” there’s no need to change the subject or fudge the truth. Instead, thank your lucky stars that your child feels comfortable enough to initiate a conversation with you about drugs. Because when it comes to helping children make good choices, one of the most important things parents can do is maintain an open and ongoing dialogue with them.
That said, it’s acceptable to tell your teen you want to focus on the here-and-now. It’s also okay ’fess up: “I did make some bad decisions, and I don’t want to see you have those experiences.”
You might also point out that much has changed over the years. For example, researchers know much more about the brain and how it is affected by alcohol and other drugs, including marijuana (which, incidentally, is far more potent today than it was in the 60s and 70s. For good, up-to-date information, go to the National Institute of Drug Abuse Web site at www.nida.nih.gov.)
Here are some other tips to help you talk to your child about drugs and substance abuse:
- Age 5 isn’t too young to look for those “teachable moments,” but gear the level and amount of information to your child’s age. A youngster, for example, may be satisfied with, “Drugs can make you feel better, but they can also cause serious problems when people can’t stop taking them.”
- Create a climate of trust so that your child feels comfortable approaching you with sensitive issues. While an ongoing dialogue is better than a big sit-down talk, do check in with your child during times of transition, including puberty.
- Set clear boundaries. Telling your underage son that he can drink alcohol at home but not elsewhere isn’t a clear boundary. Telling him it’s unacceptable for him to drink alcohol period is.
- Make no mistake, alcohol is a powerful drug that can severely affect young developing brains and bodies. In fact, the younger a child is when he or she starts, the greater the risk of developing a life-long problem.
- Walk the talk. If you want your child to drink responsibly as an adult then be a responsible drinker yourself.
- Help your child discover his or her interests. Young people who are engaged in sports, music and other healthy activities are less likely to drink and take drugs.
- If your family is going through a crisis, consider counseling, parenting classes or other steps to help resolve it. A high level of family conflict increases the risk that your child will abuse drugs and alcohol.
‘Parenting Lifeline’ is a monthly column in the Bellevue Reporter newspapers by YES Executive Director Patti Skelton-McGougan. For more information call 425-747-4937 or ChristianB@YouthEastsideServices.org
Back to top
|
|
